Blue Like Leadership

I went to a leadership conference yesterday in Everett. Author Donald Miller was the main speaker and I went with my long-time friend John O'Malley. John is a big Miller fan and it was great sharing the experience with him. It was interesting to hear Miller speak about leadership because he doesn't consider himself to be a leader. He sarcastically defined him as the second fiddle guy who would rather sit in the pew and criticize the way ministry is going. His talk consisted mostly of stories and relationships he had with people he considered to be leaders. It was a simple but profoundly powerful message. Here are the few notes I took during his session.

-It's tempting to not lead out of relationship
-Lead out of relationship...even friendship
-Lead a small group of people but influence many
-The point isn't the vision, it's including people in the vision
-Include people in your vision...even include them in your rewards
-Leaders don't point out the nothingness of culture...they speak something into the nothingness

If you have read any of Donald's books, this is right in line with his approach to life. He always seems to look past the corporate and marketed church and cuts to the core of how things are...or at least the way things should be. There seems to be a camp that says you can't have deep relationship as a leader. Keep a buffer, a cushion. Don't get too close or you can't lead. Maybe even worse, don't get too close because you might get hurt. Sometimes it's worth getting taken advantage of or even getting hurt to experience the authentic life. My mom used to say like this when she would give money to homeless people. She said that it's worth the risk of your generosity being used for something it wasn't intended for. She would always remind me as boy, "It's worth risking being taken advantage of sometimes." I think the church could operate a lot more like this. It seems living life as it was meant to be lived has a price. It would seem that leadership has that same price. As a leader sometimes it's worth taking the risks that come with relationship. Dear God, may I have the courage to lead that way.

Popularity vs. Accountability

I was given the book The Five Temptations of a CEO. As I began to read I realized that I had already read the book. However, it was a fresh reminder of some important leadership principles. I actually skipped the leadership fable about a third in and went straight to the model in the back. The 5 main temptations leaders face are:

1) Choosing status over results
2) Choosing popularity over accountability
3) Choosing certainty over clarity
4) Choosing harmony over productive conflict
5) Choosing invulnerability over trust

Personally, I feel like I struggle with temptation number two the most. It seems like many pastors would deal with this weakness. There is so much relationship emphasized in ministry and the quality of "being nice" is kind of a prerequisite for the job. It is also known that pastors on a staff can easily become very closed friends. It seems like strong advice to strive for respect rather than affection...however, that is still a very difficult idea in the ministry leadership world. I feel in order for this temptation to be overcome, there would have to be strong dialogue between a team regarding the issue. It seems like you would have to state and re-state that accountability doesn't mean loss of relationship. I would think relationship grows stronger long-term with authentic accountability. It may feel like there are short-term negative effects, but over time I think respect is built upon personal consistency and personal accountability.

I think I'll work on it. It probably starts with a conversation. May the dialogue begin.

Book Reference: The Five Temptations of a CEO - Patrick Lencioni